I’m flogging it With Some Grace today!
I’d just like to thank Grace for that awesome pun that I’m sure everyone else has used.
It’s her first week holding FYBF – so if you’re a blogger get on board!
Then I did the grocery shopping.
I took the twins in a twin trolley.
And they were foul.
They were pulling off their socks and throwing them on the ground.
As I bent down to pick them up, they were pulling boxes off the shelves.
Clip strips (the hanging displays in the aisles) are the bane of my existence.
They were when I was a ticket girl at Woolies, and are again now I am a mother with grabby handed children.
Then, with socks back on, the Two proceeded to pull each other’s socks off.
And scream at me.
Loudly.
Meanwhile, we were stopped by a plethora of well meaning elderly women.
All with the same phrases on their lips:
“Oh twins! I don’t know how you cope!”
“Oh, you DO have your hands full!”
“You are doing SO well, it must be hard.”
They were all lovely women. They were all well meaning.
One even WAS an identical twin, and had a fascinating story about how she felt her sister’s labour pains.
Which I really wanted to stop and listen to. Ask her about the relationship she has with her twin sister now. About the relationship their children have.
And whether her mother was committed at anytime throughout her twin toddler rearing years.
But all I could manage was getting the groceries in my shopping trolley and getting out of there because, as chance would have it:
Today I am not coping.
Nine and a half days out of ten, I wouldn’t call it “coping”.
I’ve spoken about this before.
I call it: “Putting one foot in front of the other.”
Coffee. Sense of humour. Pram. Rinse. Repeat.
Because my only other option is to stop and drown myself.
And I have this thing where I don’t like to get water up my nose.
I went to the doctor last week.
Told her how I was feeling.
Because I was sure that this survival mode wasn’t normal.
That living in the equivalent of a toy demo mode, with only three sayings instead of 12 was strange..
Wasn’t quite right.
She tried very hard not to laugh at my assumption that because I was struggling, I might be depressed.
Then she told me that everything I was feeling, saying and doing was incredibly normal.
For my experiences.
For my life.
For the last two years.
Then she gave me a prescription for the pill and made an appointment for Pal to have a vasectomy consultation.
Because, as it turns out, my problem is that within the space of two years I had three children.
My special children.
You can take that special whichever way you like.
Oh, and with my mood swings I could represent Australia in the Olympics.
In the PMS event.
Turns out Hormonal is my speciality.
And Survival is my normal.
And the cure for all of that is to get my hormones stabilised and not take on any more than I need to right now.
Which in my GP’s not-so-suger-coated talk means: “Don’t have any more children, whatever you do.”
–
When I told My Bestie Amelia all of this on the phone, she told me:
“It’s because you wear makeup. People think if you’ve got time to put make up on, you must be doing all right.”
And it’s true. I am doing all right.
But the next time someone asks me how I cope I’m likely to let my nervous eye twitch loose on them and ask them:
What exactly constitutes coping?
Because if its bright eyeshadow, I OWN this coping shiz.
you are divine Daisy…I dont often comment, but I read a lot. Not because of the eye makeup but because you make me laugh. I also have the ‘but you always look like you have it under control’ statement thrown at me when in actual fact I wake up most days wondering if its an anxiety disorder or depression that I have. I have 4 – one ours, one mine, two his. Some days I wake and wish it was exactly 12 hours later.
My son ran away from me this morn and hopped on the escalators and waved bye bye with his chubby 18 month old hand.
Lets run away together – we can drink coffee and try on eyeshadow and breathe out. Im done too x
Sarah recently posted..the downhill slide.
I often think that anyone with twins needs a medal. Daisy someone once told me just ‘fake it til you make it’ you are doing an awesome job!
Oh Daisy, big hugs to you! We will definately have to catch up and drink a bucket of coffee whilst hiding from our children or locking them in a safely enclosed park yard
I also have a sneaking suspicion our GP is the same person lol
Groceries are definately my most dreaded part of the week and I would say it gets easier as they get older but I think id be kidding myself I Know Z has been known to scream and pull things off the shelf at 3!
I love your eye-shadow(s)! So bright – just like you! And I’m sorry you’re not feeling so bright right now. I totally hear you. I think you’ve created your own therapy though – by making us laugh (and I hope you laughed while writing stuff down that made us laugh). Hope something things feel brighter soon (or that you win the lottery and get a full time nanny to help you out with the Two). x
Deb @ Bright & Precious recently posted..Be Alive
I was often asked the same thing with my two. Not that they are twins. But man, two kids in a trolly are a whole team of badass honey badger hell.
I always, always wear makeup. It helps me cope. It doesn’t, and didn’t mean I always was. But even on my worst days, I knew that I could at least control one thing, and that was my face. Well, y’know until those badass babies made me cry.
I have no magic words for you. No great coping mechanism or whiz bang trick that will help. Just know you are not alone. We all put one step in front of the other and hope to not go bat shit crazy most days, and there is makeup, and a pantry, and wine.
xxx
Naomi recently posted..The one where I blog a recipe.
I do love that honeybadger video
Rhia @ Mummy’s Gone Mad recently posted..I am back and I’m married
God bless well meaning elderly ladies and their platitudes.
It would be awesome if you could keep doing the not-drowning and the survival thing, missus xx
Jayne recently posted..Damn Unpretty
first of all I LOVE your bright eye shadow! Big hugs daisy. Maybe thats where im going wrong. I stopped wearing makeup all together unless i was going somewhere. Maybe i should start getting into that pattern before MissE goes to school or it wont be pretty
Lifeasmummymax recently posted..A day at the beach
God love the old ladies, and your doctor.
And hey, 9 1/2 out of 10 days is pretty darn awesome if you ask me. I’d be happy with that.
Jess recently posted..Fame
Lol I can totally relate- though I only have one ‘grabby handed’ child. Still sees me cruising down the dead centre of the aisle in Coles
Visiting from FYBF
Rhia @ Mummy’s Gone Mad recently posted..I am back and I’m married
Oh Daisy I think you’re awesome. I only have TWO kids under 3 and not only do I not wear make up I dont even brush my hair 5 days out of 7. The fact that you go grocery shopping even though your hubby works at woolies means either you are awesome or you need a little bit of psychotherapy. If you ever do want to talk it through with someone go back to the doctor and insist. as long as the wine goes in your mouth and out your nose instead of in your nose.
the mother experiment recently posted..“me too”
Christ, if eye make up constitutes as coping I am NEVER going to get my shit together!! Love your guts xxx
Nee recently posted..{Team Friday} Is Nike really on to something?
Daisy, I have shopping moments like that and I only have two under two! I reckon you’re doing amazing, and as always love the way you write xx
Elisa recently posted..One day it all changed. Everything. In an instant.
I think I’ve been one of those people who says those incredible unhelpful things to a mum with twins
You are amazing. And your eyeshadow is gorgeous!
Kylie @ Octavia and Vicky recently posted..Opportunity Knocks
I feel like eating my words off my blog today. Twins. You are effing amazing no matter if you are coping or not. x
Lipgloss Mumma recently posted..Grateful for…a new day
We touched on this last Saturday. It’s hard. Farkin’ hard.
You’ll get there, Daisy. Maybe not today or tomorrow. But you and that beautiful eye shadow will see some truly wonderful days. You’ve got spunk and spirit to ensure that. x
Grace recently posted..A Mama’s no-brainer {Survey promotion and chance to win a grand prize worth $5,000}
That could have been me writing that. Everything, the coping or lack of, hormonal etc. I wish I could find that balance. I often go shopping with our younger four kids who are under 5 and it can be chaos. Hubby works at woolies where we shop and I just wish I could hide most times but it must be done.
Veronica @Two Plus Seven recently posted..Thankful Thursday
Daisy I really like enjoy your posts. I know so many people are saying you have a great make up, but I really mean it. You are an excellent writer as well.
Emotions are your brains way of coping with the change, and accepting them and letting them pass will make the process much easier.
Laura recently posted..Procedures before the teeth implants
This is the first time I have visited and read your blog, and I have got to tell you I love it already. I will be back. Thank you for making me laugh. I am a mother of twins myself and through some of this i felt i was reading about myself. Hang in there, we will survive! (i hope)
I had 2 kids in 16months and 3 under 5 and that was insane.. HBs a twin.. twins were babies number 6 and 7…dont know how the MIL did it… glad she did though hes kinda cute
xx just keep swimming xx
Mum’s the Word recently posted..More Crappy Tales