So, I’m quiet these past few days. I know.
It’s because I’m busy being the best mum in the universe.
And by best mum I mean crappest person alive.
Yesterday morning – whilst trying to pick my daughter up off the ground and get her to leave her brother alone (cuddle attack was in progress) and get her shoes on at the same time – I managed to hurt my child.
At first I thought it was a dislocated elbow. I’ve heard of it happening and was concerned but sure the hospital would fix her up and we’d be apples.
I mean, I was concerned about mandatory reporting and having my daughter taken away but mostly I wanted them to fix her pain.
After an hour at the hospital, some super drugs and some frightening shrieking during X-ray, she perked up and started waving her arms around again and I thought for sure it must have been dislocated and all the jostling in X-ray had fixed her right up.
Turns out the drugs had just kicked in and she’s got a sprain.
Which is making her super precious and extra snuggly.
I’ve already fed her up on red jelly and chocolate milk, and I do believe there’s probably some ice cream and chicken nuggets in her near future.
You can call it “guilt” food if you like.
I’m calling it “please don’t remember that I hurt you and tell everyone we meet in the street for the next two weeks” food.
While I was at the hospital my mother and sister looked after the Two and went all psycho on my house.
Now it’s clean and organized and I’m having trouble functioning without having to walk like I’m on the moon to avoid stepping on stuff.
Which is all fine by me. Because I’m stuck on the couch under The Oh So Precious One watching the Two destroy all their hard work.
Please tell me I’m not the only one this has happened to. Also, contact me if you’re interested in having my mum and sister organize your house. Those women are sitting on a gold mine and they’re just giving it away for free!