The 52 Week Project: The one where I lose weight without trying…
Turns out I lost 1.8kg this week. Which is really a 1.2kg loss towards my goal because I gained last week (damn you PMS and bloating).
Which is very surprising.
Now, seeing as I am obviously a self-professed Weight Loss Guru, I thought I’d share some Weight Loss Tips from the past week with you:
How to Lose Weight and Alienate Your Family:
1. Don’t get enough sleep. This will make you cranky and pissy at your husband. Because he obviously has been getting more sleep than you and is so damned chirpy. He’ll be so cranky, he won’t make you cups of tea and coffee or snacks when he gets his own. That’s saving calories right there.
2. Take your family for Maccas in the park. And using some of your new found energy decide to play with your toddler on the equipment before sitting down to eat. If you’re lucky, your other children will be hungry and eat everyone else’s food while they aren’t being supervised properly. That’s saving calories.
Oscar. Grand Theft Chicken. Guilty.
3. Be in the midst of just finishing day toilet training with one child, and beginning with another. Mopping is fabulous exercise. That’s working off calories.
4. In fact, just find some toddlers and take care of them. Three seems to be enough to keep me busy and running around. That’s surely working off some calories.
5. Run out of healthy, fresh diet food. And be too lazy to walk to the shops to get more. You have two choices here. Eat processed foods, bread or pasta. All forms of your ex Fluffy Deliciousness. Or drink some water and wait for your husband to get home. If you choose the latter, say it with me: That’s saving calories. Also, today will be the only day you drink enough water, make it count.
6. Migrate your blog to a self-hosted WordPress. I swear you will be so preoccupied you will forget to eat. And maybe forget to feed your children. Once. Or twice… And that’s with someone amazing (like Michelle from Little Hero Designs and Hosting) doing most of it for you! That’s saving calories!
7. Drink wine. Lots of it. Because you are stressed and because it is yummy. It’s not working off or saving calories. At all. But it might alienate your family from you the next morning.
8. Take the 30 Day Sex Challenge. Seriously. Sex is great exercise. Even if you are a starfish. At least your heart rate rises. At least I hope it does… Work it off while you’re getting it on!
9. Sit out the front and just look at the bogans walk past your front yard. Be smug in your own less-bogan bubble as you sit on your floral outdoor lounge and watch your children play on your astro-turfed front verandah. Smugness is good for weight loss, it would seem. Who knew?
10. Walk to your local Big W, overspend and then present your husband with the receipt. When he tries to go off at you give him the “You always spend more than me, so don’t even start look” and then run. These people doing C25K aren’t really in it for fitness and weight loss, they just need to escape after admitting to a shopping spree!
In all reality, my weight loss to date (11.2kg) is due to increasing my water intake, portion control, mostly healthy eating and increased exercise (thank you Precious the Pram).
I am the smallest I’ve been since March 2010. And now I fit into these shorts I bought in September 2010, even though I knew they were too small for me. I am also obsessed with this new hat. From Big W…
This week I’m hosting the 52 Week Project for Fiona at My Mummy Daze, while she’s on holiday. Half her luck. While she’s living the life of Riley (because being on holiday with your husband and children is so {NOT} relaxing) why not head over and like her on Facebook? Fiona has set herself a goal to get to 1000 likers by the end of November. And then there will be an awesome giveaway!
To see this week’s inspiring submissions from other Mummies in the 52 Week Project just scroll down and follow the links uploaded over the next week.
- Follow My Mummy Daze (who doesn’t like some blog-lovin’?!)
- Grab The 52 Week Project button and post it in your sidebar or in your own 52 Week Project post
- Add the link to your 52 Week Project post (or add your Flickr URL) in the Link-up below
- Remember to share the comment-love and support the other project members!
